2016 – Things I Did (Didn’t) Do

So, 2016… it’s ending. I suppose for some it will have already slipped into 2017, into another year of possibility. Looking back, it has been a funny, even strange year for myself… then again, aren’t they all in some way. So, here is what’s happened – the good, the bad, and the ugly:

  • Attended university for a… week
  • Begun writing poetry.
  • Evolved my love of Tea!
  • Didn’t fall completely apart.
  • Read 23 books.
  • Begun seriously meditating.
  • Scrapped two semi-written novels.
  • Kept a semi-regular diary.
  • Completed a few short-stories.
  • Found the tiniest shred of happiness.
  • Realised many things.
  • Uncovered many revelations.
  • Grown my hair.
  • Felt deep jealousy.
  • Felt contempt in my abilities.
  • Come to love at least something.

And that’s that. I hope 2017 brings the best things it can. And that I reach places and do things I never have before.

Happy New Year to you all! 🙂

-Chris ❤

Once A Living Ghost

Dreaming, I thought

Of what could be, but certainly wasn’t.

Of all that was, and all that’s gone.

 

Dark in the room, that’s all.

Past memories; lost opportunities.

Life in Limbo – seclusion at best.

 

Something in hand, purpose questioning,

Drawing shallow lines of red.

Couldn’t stop that relentless questioning.

In contempt of life;

In arrogance of want and need.

 

No sense of purpose, not even a shred.

Walking thorough one’s life,

Unsure, maybe alive, maybe dead.

A living ghost, paranormal dread.

 

Senseless sitting, scared of true living.

Berating one’s entire feeble being.

Accepting of what I had become.

A world, used to coming wholly undone.

 

So, it seemed like the only way;

The only desire in the darkest of days.

Sitting, and drawing those bright red lines.

The City Nowadays – Truth In Words

These are not my words. Of course, all credit goes to L.A. Salami, check out my recent post on him, look him up, listen with all your heart and soul.

“I’ve got heartache, headache, high cholesterol, low self esteem.
The terrorists are out to get me because I approved of Noam
Chomsky beating on his chest. – Illegally downloading music’s become too easy – it’ s destroying the culture.
But I don’ t wanna pay for it – fuck that. I’ve got bills to pay, I’ ve got food to eat – I don’t earn that much money –

There are jobs nowhere, I can’t find any!
What happened to Rock and Roll? What happened to Hip Hop? What happened to the cinema?

Films used to be…Great. Now they’re easy to make, easy to sell, easy to get bored of – everything’ s 4 stars or more – Everything’s the best film of the year – Fast food films – Fast food music – Fast food politics – Fast food ideologies – What’s the worth of working to live at the cost of your soul? So much so that you don’t want to live at all?”

– L.A. Salami – The City Nowadays

Terror and the Moon

From plate to plate in the world of green,

Motion in the sway of stiff grass,

Vibration in life that has come and gone;

Slow or fast.

Lived at a pace, comfortable in its ritual glance.

Rabbit hole and fox burrow,

Blind in the sheep’s deep wool,

And in the terror that lurks far, far above.

Extinguish and rebirth;

An unending perpetual circle, unstoppable.

Force upon force, exhibited.

Motion after motion, always sensed in line.

Edges felt; sandpaper smooth.

Different shoes to be worn with the turn of the moon.

From one passage to the next.

Undying in the light of secular angst.

From which a sprout is birthed;

From which one turns to insipid earth.

A Year In Books – 2016

These are the books I have read in 2016. They’re in no particular order. I do suppose this is entirely inane topic, and very borning to read, though, I guess it serves a tiny purpose, being that I want to read more in 2017, much more!

My goal for 2016 was 40 books – I only managed 23. So, in the year coming, I want to make it my mission to hit 40! Maybe even more. Here they are:

 

  • The Long Earth – Terry Pratchett/Stephen Baxter
  • The Long War- Terry Pratchett/Stephen Baxter
  • The Long Mars – Terry Pratchett/Stephen Baxter
  • The Long Utopia – Terry Pratchett/Stephen Baxter
  • Across the Universe – Beth Revis
  • A Million Suns – Beth Revis
  • Shades of Earth – Beth Revis
  • Harry Potter and the Philosophers Stone – JK Rowling
  • Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets – JK Rowling
  • Wind/Pinball – Haruki Murakami
  • The Elephant Vanishes – Haruki Murakami
  • These Broken Stars – Amie Kaufman/Meagan Spooner
  • All the Light We Cannot See – Anthony Doerr
  • The Handmaiden’s Tale – Margaret Atwood
  • Foundation – Isaac Asimov
  • The Man in the High Castle – Philip K. Dick
  • Farenheit 451 – Ray Bradbury
  • Mosquitoland – David Arnold
  • The Alchemist – Paulo Cohelo
  • Into the Wild – Jon Krakauer
  • Truths, Half Truths and Little White Lies – Nick Frost
  • The Ocean at the End of The Lane – Neil Gaiman
  • The Windup Girl – Paolo Bacigalupi

 

If you’ve read any, by all means comment and tell me what you think of them. And I always like a good recommendation too!

-Chris ❤

What Is and What Isn’t

I find myself hoping,

Awash in a sense of my own wrongs.

And yet, that is not how I see them.

Because what I speak is true, utterly.

And I am a fool for thinking all things can be as one;

As equal in the night as they are in the day.

For one, and for two, it can never be the same.

A wish, a hello, a merry – maybe it’s too much.

Maybe it is not at the forefront.

I try to believe, and I try to think;

Understand where the difference is, link to link.

In what is and what isn’t.

In what might be and what mightn’t.

Is there really any difference?

Am I not deserving, not strong.

Rotting in pitiful servitude where I belong.

I don’t beg, and I don’t ask.

I sit, and await the next.

Mind fading towards the day in which there will not be.

Strong – maybe not so much then…