Those Who I Love

There are very few people in this world that I like, and there are even fewer that I love. We all know how strange, painful, and beautiful love can be. Love is an idealistic thing, we all want it to work out exactly the way we think it should, exactly the way we believe it to be. We see nothing else as acceptable, it is incomparable.

There is my family – that love is unconditional, of course. And then there is one other person I feel something close, some type of love towards. Not romantic, or at least not measurably. For it is complicated, very much so. And something such as that would most likely be an impossibility. Yet, this does not mean I value it any less, because it has become one of the most important things in my life. Anyhow, love comes in all different forms – romantic love is just one type.

Obviously I am no Master of Love, my anxiety has always prevented that, and I don’t see a time in the near future when it won’t be an impossibility – not the ‘love’ itself, but what it might take to reach that point, what I would have to do in order for it to come around. And I don’t see any point in the future, period, when it will be anything but massively hard. But this is my life, this is who I am, and that is something that I must come to accept. That is the most important thing anyone has to accept.

Love can come in my future, I will accept that, I will wait for that. There is one thing I always think – You cannot miss something you have never had. I don’t know if somebody else said this, or whether it is something my unconscious mind conjures up.

Does it matter?

-Chris ❤

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