Alright, so, I’ve been lapsing in the amount of things I’ve been putting out there, on here. I don’t know exactly why this is. But, it is something I want to change.
(Over the last few days I’ll blame the food poisoning I received from eating some rather sketchy, and frankly dubious tofu that had been open a little too long… but, alas! That is no excuse.)
I’ve been struggling to find the motivation, and the ideas for the type of content I want to create – the type I want to be viewed. Then again, when hasn’t the complete absence of motivation marred my life…?
I want to write so much more poetry, but recently, the amount of ideas supplied to me seem comparable to the water content of the Sahara desert. Though, maybe I have simply become pickier with the type of things I’m willing to publish. Maybe I’m setting a higher standard for myself, and without realising it, the flow of concepts is being stemmed. I sit, and I think, but there is nothing of value, nothing that I can turn into words, nothing that means anything. My mind feels like a swirling pit of useless drivel that even I couldn’t care about. I don’t know how to transform that into something tangible, something that has depth, and meaning.
There are other things I want to work on too. Namely, what I like to call ‘Tiny Stories‘ – stories that are usually less than a 1000 words. But even these take time to write, and the motivation is as equally elusive. I wish I could sit and naturally write for hours upon hours; poetry, stories, outlines, chapters of WIPS – anything! Yet, it is not natural, it is something that I have to carefully curate, carefully watch and pull myself back to when I am going off track.
Of course, as with anything you love, you carry on trying, you find a way to make things work. There’s no doubt that I’ll do this. A life without writing – any kind – it would appear, well, utterly barren, starved of colour.
But don’t worry, I’ll get back into it. There’s much more to come. I’ve got to sort through that drivel at some point, right?